How to talk to a child about sensitive topics like body and size

Here are some recommendations on how to create a safe environment when talking to a child about food, shape and body size.

Here we represent ways to start a conversation about food and size, where the aim is to create a safe and supportive environment for the child.

A good starting point is to have the chat somewhere where the child feels safe and supported. Being rested and relaxed is beneficial too, for both adult and child. Make sure that you both have plenty of time to chat, with noting else happening next. Going for a walk, building lego or having a drive together are all examples of when a good chat can be had.

The adult can open up by mentioning how bodies are portrayed in the media, or that someone on TV got lots of attention by looking a certain way. Explore how the child feels about this, and let him/her talk about any thoughts related to these topics.

When the child sounds more in tuned to talking about this, then the adult can try to steer the conversation towards how friends/classmates talk about body size and shape at e.g school. Has the child noticed any changes in attitudes amongst its peers when it comes to looks and appearance? Has anyone talked about this during football practice?

If the child mentions that he/she doesn't like PE or wants to quit ballet class, then you can bring this up in a supportive manner where your main concern is the well-being of the child and his/her feelings around this. The goal is to let the child open up on how he/she thinks about their own body, and if they themselves notices differences and how bodies look.

Preparations prior to talking to the child:

Think about what the goal of the conversation is. It should not e about fixing a problem or making it go away, but making it safe for the child to feel able to talk about difficult emotions/experiences
The main responsibility as an adult is to try to understand how this affects the child
Work on how to empathise with the child and acknowledge the child's emotions. Practice saying e.g. "Hearing someone say that must have been very tough"

Important steps when talking to children about emotions and reactions:

Recognise and acknowledge the foundation of the child's reactions
Together find the words that can describe how the child is feeling, and that the reaction is valid
Explore what the child needs from you right now
Validate the emotions and support the child in that is ok to react to what happened/what was said
Identify the most pressing issues and work together on how to deal with them more specifically

Check list when talking to the child

Everyone has a body that is unique and different from all others. Bodies are amazing, regardless of how they look.
Maintain the focus on health and function. Avoid looks or size as reasons for living healthily or choosing to be more active together
Size and shape do not define who we are or our value as individuals
If the child receives comments relating to body shape, weight or size, then praise the child for being open about it. Let the child know that the right thing to do is tell an adult that he/she trusts.
Everyday life should not focus on constant talks about bodies, food choices and size. Address healthy living habits by being more physically active because we need strong bones/muscles in life, rather than saying we need to "burn off calories" or "work up an appetite". Talk about different food groups in terms of increasing interest in making food together, what bodies need to be healthy and that no foods are bad, naughty or contain too many calories.

Last updated 9/1/2026